anecdote or antidote?

I don't so much want to escape this place, this tundra of -20 degrees ferenheit, no. In fact I've never been more content here with growing friendships, leadening anchors and true purpose. It's just that --- my first love! Travel. Adventure. Having something to write about. If I'm not somewhere I'm not anything and when I'm nowhere and think about somewhere my heart races, my palms sweat and my mouth waters. What is that? Lust?

Whoever decided to invent the word "content" must have lived a charmed life. I'm doing my darndest to find contentment, and really the only time I feel that I have half a chance of not going insane from restlessness -- the need to go to Mexico, Colombia, Brazil or really wherever God will lead me -- is when I spend a time in prayer.

Prayer. It's a funny thing to go from total confusion to complete peace in just a single moment from just a few words uttered up to outer space.

This restlessness gets a tougher to choke back everyday. Anxious to go and becoming more anchored here; getting less attached and more involved, and on another level more attached; letting God handle things here and then being obligated to stay anyway. Thinking on what Pastor Mark might say if asked about it all, I think I'll start here and start small and His plan will unfold, doors will open - or close - , my heart will lead me as long as my heart is the Lord's; now He and my heart are safely locked up just to the right of my soul.