It's not Real

A conference I recently went to, Faithwalkers, made me think on the subject of life after death, and life here on earth. First, I'd like to point out that on top of discussions, some songs, and a book I'm reading, I also happen to have this particular relationship with Jesus that heightens the following sentiments.

I dislike being here. I don't enjoy being forced to meander about in this body and disappoint myself and watch others like me living in a general state of pitiable fleshliness.

I comfort myself with the sole fact that it isn't real. Let me explain, because clearly things like pain, lonliness, and failure are very real. I feel I can endure these things for just a little while longer because in a few eternally measured minutes it will be over, like a bad dream.

My nephew, 8, was contemplating being a grandfather someday and my only reply was, "Just give it a minute." In a minute we'll all be asked to measure our lives against holiness, perfection. We have control over this dream, we can make happen what will, we can prevent, cause, destroy, build up, and live however we want. When we wake up, the decisions we've made will be measured against true reality. If we choose to ignore Reality in this life, we will be forced into an eternity of very real disappointment, pain, and failure. And these sentiments on earth will be a mere shadow of those felt far beyond the end of time.

The reality is that this body is imperfect and I will not be allowed to wake up to Heaven unless I acknowledge in my dream that Heaven is real. That I am weak, that I have nothing, am nothing, can never hope to be anything unless Christ, the One Reality, makes me perfect enough to live with Him. No one else can do that.

Anyone who disagrees has not taken an honest look at his own heart. I cannot be the only one who feels this wretched as a human. My only joy comes from knowing that I am loved, cleansed, and having acknowledged with my lips that Christ is the only Way I have eternity to look forward to, not to dread.