I will do the 1, 2, 3 of a personal update for you so that you're no longer in the dark about what I've been up to. Some have come to suspect me of being a spy, a double-agent, of living in China, etc., you know, the typical conclusions people draw because of my lack of communication.
1. Review of the ministries I help out with and their statuses (stati?):
Dormitory of Girls
Huge huge changes on the horizon. I believe it will be good, awesome, but change is hard. We are shuffling around the girls' dorms which translates to nearly all my girls moving out of my dorm and into the "next one up." I told management that I would like to move up with them, but no one has made me any promises. I understand that where there is need is where I'll be placed.
My relationship with these beautiful girls has grown over the years and to be quite honest this change is going to be one of the hardest things I'll have to do so far in this ministry. They are so precious and I've grown quite emotional and attached when I pray about their past, for their present and for their future. You might say that I love them deeply... I include a blanket prayer for all the children of the home, but my girls I regularly mention to our Father by name - even the ones that have already "graduated" out of my dorm.
I want to see them all grow in Christ, love Him deeply, and seek Him earnestly. If there is any reward in this ministry I may not see it until I stand before the One who gave me this job to begin with, and I pray for reward - not for me, but because it will be evidence that their lives were changed forever because of a teensy thing we call obedience.
Multimedia/Office
When the girls are in school I need something to occupy all these cranial powers, so I work in the multimedia department (photography, video, promoting awareness, website maintenance, general communication, etc.). This is right up my alley and has been a challenge from the beginning! I enjoy this type of work and hope to always improve and continue down this road within this ministry and beyond.
Audiovisual/Church
I'm also the head of the audiovisual team at church (projection, video and lighting). There are 12 team members in my charge, and I am training in three of them to be "me" should I happen to leave that particular ministry or should I die and/or go on vacation sometime in the near future - none of which are in my near-future plans. It's productive, fun, and also a challenge to keep things going smoothly: recording, aesthetics, people management, cultivating leadership and responsibility, inspiring a heart of worship through ministry, etc.
2. Plans for the Future:
None!
I exaggerate a little when I say that. I talked to a friend about sharing these things and usually it's difficult to admit what is in my heart - expose myself publicly like this - but he encouraged me that my heart is mine to share, and if there are repurcussions, I still reserve the right to my own heart.
My plans are currently summed up in one small phrase: Wait on God to do whatever it is He will do.
My dreams are summed up in several more phrases than that. The Gravity Project is something I haven't really been fervently working on. There is a lot going on in my current ministry, but it is something I remain relatively faithful to, if not always consistent. Simply put, it is a website (currently nothing more than a blog, a seedling, still a version of my heart flying around there on the interwebs) that one day I want to see grow into something solid that will facilitate the brave men and women of mission work, ministry, and prayer houses around the world.
Ministry is not for weenies, and the last thing I want to promote through the Gravity Project is that "it's fun." It's heartbreaking is what it is! But the reality is that there is nothing else worth doing except "the will of the Father." This is what the Gravity Project is about.
3. Me on the inside:
Well now this is where it gets a little messy. I am working on a special "internal" project which involves more obedience. There have been very clear moments that God has outlined what I should be doing with my time - the time in which I am waiting on whatever it is He's going to do. I summed it up for Susy one day saying He wants me to "wait, work, and worship." I got the first two down pretty pat I think, but I think I've been missing the train on the third.
I'm not talking about joining the worship team, there are enough people in that ministry to make up a chorus or two. I'm talking about a heart of worship, a heart that sings because of a God who inspires praise, love, a depth of feeling like nothing else. I think that these big changes about to take place in the ministry are going to help me refocus, reboot, and begin a new kind of disciplined routine that invovles early morning alonetime worship.
I have enough flaws without announcing them, but if you ever need some filler for your prayer list, you can add: "Emily - devotion, heart of worship and intercession, and most of all depth to her relationship with Christ."
Summary:
This personal update has been extra personal, somewhat revelatory. Ministry, future, and present have been covered. I hope that I've encouraged you to continue digging deeper in your relationship with Christ and to take personal risks when it comes to obeying the Father. Don't chicken out!
